Thursday, August 22, 2013
Personally, I think it's a bit arrogant of me to put any significance on a random day, out of billions of people, to even acknowledge that day as anything other than just another day.
But having survived cancer up to this point, it has given me pause to at least thank The Universe. One of the best minds in Oncology only gave me 4-6 months when I was first diagnosed.
Just goes to show that even the best of us can be wrong. I may regress as it's still too early to tell, but I beat the odds. That's gotta count for something, even if it's only within me.
So with that said, I have begun making preparations for September 2nd. On that day I will officially be considered an "old guy". It seems the combination of the numbers 6 and 0 are the standard for oldguyness. There is a list of things I need to do to get ready.
1. Superglue my left turn signal to the always on position.
2. Carry a note pad everywhere I go because I can forget something important, even 15 seconds after I think of it.
3. Wear suspenders daily as they are actually needed now and not just a fashion accessory for Old Guys.
4. Obsess over the current weather and weather forecasts in every conversation because that seems to be what old guys start and end every conversation with.
5. Learn to ignore the Horns Of Anger as I insist on staying in the far left lane, traveling two miles an hour under the posted speed limit.
6. Start reading the obituaries because I want to see who I outlived.
7. Keep my glasses attached to a lanyard around my neck because I have already lost two pair and I think I remember specifically where I left them. They are not There or even in the general vicinity of There. They have traveled to the place of lost socks.
I'm sure there are other things I need to do. In fact, I know there are...but I didn't write them down immediately after thinking of them.
blather and mumbling provided by Ken Starks at 8:28 AM